Monday, October 30, 2006
A modern day miracle: all of the redneck food groups represented in ONE store window!
Kind of makes ya hungry for pork rinds, doesn't it?
# posted by Amanda at 12:19 PM |
1 comments
Friday, October 20, 2006
Ponder this, party people:
1. How much of a jackass does a person have to be to pump gas with one hand and smoke a cigarette with the other?
2. By how many exponents does the jackass quotient increase when the gas pumping smoker in question is wearing his fire department uniform at the time?
# posted by Amanda at 6:47 PM |
0 comments
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Housekeeping
A few of the readers who actually swing by this site (rather than getting their Cheez on via RSS feed) have asked about the new[ish] masthead. Yes indeed, there is a story behind (ha!) the new theme. Some time ago, after listening to me meander to the conclusion that my epic inability to find jeans that fit is because I frequent stores that cater to the demographic equivalent of Wonderbread, one of my darker-skinned friends commented laconically, "You got ass for a white girl!" To her credit, she managed to make it sound something like a compliment.
Why yes, I DO score higher than the average whitebred in the butt-to-body-mass ratio. Come, take shelter in the shadow of my excellence!
Just in case you're wondering, that's not my derriere pictured in the masthead. It's a stunt butt.
White and Nerdy
I have never played World of Warcraft---nor do I intend to, because seriously, JUST SAY NO---but damn if I haven't cackled with glee over the WoW dance videos on Google and YouTube. Here is another! And another! And yet another! Ooo, look, this one has the Numa Numa song!
The dance moves in these videos came from various sources compiled here, if you're interested.
(By the way, I'm not at all embarrassed about the obvious amount of time that went into "researching" these many fine videos. Ahem.)
Yet Another Activity I Will Be Performing While Wearing Rubber Gloves
Have you noticed the infrequency of the updates 'round this joint? Yeah, I've been working a lot recently. A. LOT. Which also means a lot of time on the road driving to and from the office. In addition to seeing people driving in bumper to bumper traffic while eating breakfast, putting on makeup, reading the newspaper and - I swear I am not making this up - watching a portable DVD player, I have seen people flossing their teeth. Seriously, that can't wait until you get to the office?!
Also, I am simply astounded by the high percentage of people drive with a finger or two lodged up their noses. Hey, commuters? Those clear things known as windows that are all around your cars? I can see you through them, and I want you to STOP PICKING YOUR NOSE. RIGHT NOW.
Unfortunately, bearing witness to these horrors has pretty much eliminated the possibility that in the future I will ever buy a used car or drive a rental car. Because I have come to the realization that (1) whatever the nose pickers picked out will need to be deposited somewhere and (2) if they had a tissue handy for that they probably would have used it in the first place. I'm just saying.
# posted by Amanda at 8:02 PM |
1 comments
Monday, October 09, 2006
"May" Bite, My Ass!
If you should happen to go to Busch Gardens in Williamburg and get the notion to enter the lorikeet house, beware the red birds. I have beak marks on my shoulder and Sean is missing part of a neck mole.
# posted by Amanda at 9:56 PM |
0 comments
Monday, October 02, 2006
What I'm about to write here is probably going to make me sound very shallow or just plain mean, but... Sophie, at the ripe old age of three, already has a playmate who I don't much like. The child in question is a little girl a couple years older than Sophie. In reality, she doesn't come around all that often, but when she does the experience is tangibly irritating. I don't encourage their playdates. On the contrary, I go out of my way to avoid them.
Here's the thing: I can't put my finger on what it is about this kid, exactly, that grates on my nerves.
I might add that we've known the girl for a few years, since she was a toddler. I didn't find her objectionable until about the past year, maybe the past year and a half. So whatever the issue is, it's a relatively recent development. Unfortunately, it renders her, in my opinion, 100% unappealing.
And I feel kind of bad about that because she is, afterall, just a little kid.
# posted by Amanda at 6:46 PM |
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